A big family is a big team. Many parents find joy and happiness in children or grandchildren. But there are those who do not consider large families a positive phenomenon. They say unpleasant things about families with many children: parents with many children are irresponsible people who create poverty and live at the expense of the state. Is this true? – Kirill Yurovskiy, a father from a large family, answers.
Pros and cons
The pros of large families are as follows:
- Children play with each other and do not distract the parents’ attention – they even have more free time than families with one child. He’s bored, he demands adult attention all day long, asking to be held in his arms.
- Of course, there are many responsibilities in a large family and you can not always cope with them, but you can always call children to help – it’s very good and right. Some parents do not agree with this, considering it an exploitation of child labor. But if the child is not accustomed to household chores, it will be bad for him in adulthood. When starting a family, such lazy children will have huge problems in setting up housekeeping and running a household. According to statistics, the number of divorces in large families is lower than in a regular family. In a large family, children do all kinds of work – taking care of younger sisters or brothers, going to the store, knowing how to cook dinner or wash dishes. In a word, such children grow up to be independent people!
- Imitation of older siblings, which is important for the speech development of younger ones in the family.
- Age hierarchy – a large group of children are able to come up with entertainment for themselves, make new rules in the games. Here the younger ones obey the older kids – the main thing is to make sure that there is no harassment of the little ones.
- A large family – it’s a force: growing up, the children will always be helpers for each other. By the way, selfish people rarely grow up in such families; more often they are kind and generous people.
- Children are a good support for parents in their old age. The only child will go to live in a nursing home. In large families, this situation is minimized!
- A woman fully realizes herself as a mother, because nature did not endow her with the childbearing function for nothing. Most women in their old age regret that they did not have many children.
Minuses of having many children
There are few disadvantages to large families – it’s more like a false myth:
- Jealousy of children in a large family. Many people believe that in large families, older children are jealous of their parents to the younger ones – they are loved less. This can happen if a younger brother or sister is born. It is understandable – the child was loved, and then there is a new member of the family, which parents give their attention and love. But with the arrival of the second, third, fourth baby, it is experienced easily, there is no jealousy. But if parents are constantly singling out one child and criticizing the other, there may be jealousy.
- Lack of communication – parents can not give everyone the same attention. This is not really a terrible disadvantage – in order to raise a real person, you do not have to constantly communicate, make comments, or impose their opinion. In such families, children learn from each other’s mistakes and from their parents’ behavior.
- The illness of one will lead to the infection of the other children. Yes, this is true, but this disadvantage can be successfully dealt with.
- In large families, the household members have no personal space – in fact sometimes you want to be alone with his thoughts, to dream, to cry, to sit in silence. Maybe it’s a minus, but a family with many children – it’s a special world with its own traditions and habits, characters and worldview. The appearance of each child in the family – this is an important event for the adults, a new level of relationship between the spouses. Families with many children know what family happiness is.
- Raising several children is difficult in monetary terms, even for rich people. This is due to the unstable economic situation, low-paying jobs.
- Women in large families devote themselves entirely to children, so they ruin their careers.
To strive to create a large family or not – the right and choice of each couple, the main thing that it reigns in comfort, harmony and love. It’s wonderful when a man knows that on his return from work he is waited at home by his loving children and wife, someone needs him in this life. A family with many children is a lot of work.